BarChick's Best Chat Up Lines

BarChick has been chatted up on a few occasions (naturally), some work / some make us laugh / some make you call security. Here are some options...


"Can I borrow your phone? I need to phone God and tell him I have found his missing angel"

"If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together"

"Are you tired? Cos you've been running through my mind all day"

"Shall we talk or continue flirting from a distance?"

"Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk past again?"


"I bet you £10 you’re gonna turn me down"

"I’ll cook you dinner if you'll cook me breakfast?"

*Lick finger and wipe on guy/girl's shirt* "Right, let's get you out of those wet clothes"

"Did you get your jeans on sale? Because in my house they're 100% off"

"Let's bypass all the bullsh*t and just get naked"

"I wish you were my big toe... Then I would bang you on every piece of furniture at my house"

"Hey baby, I bet you Excel between the spreadsheets"

"Do you know what a man with a 12 inch d*ck has for breakfast? No? Well I have bacon and eggs"

"Oh sh*t, I just dropped the keys to my Porsche"

"All those curves, and me with no brakes"

"You know something? You really look like my future ex-wife"

Ask a girl to feel your jumper and then say: "what material is that?" She will venture a guess, then you say: "boyfriend material"

"F*ck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Sylvester?"

"I have many leather bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany"

"Let's play Kerplunk"

"Nice shoes, let's f*ck"

"Your clothes - give them to me." (Arnold Schwarzenegger - Terminator)

"Look, just close your eyes and think about George Clooney"

"Are you a parking ticket? Cos you've got fine written all over you"

"That dress would look great on my bedroom floor"

"Do you need help carrying your bible? It looks heavy"

"The only thing I want to come between us is latex"


"I'm looking for treasure - can I look around your chest?"

"Do you want to go and do what I'm going to tell my friends we did anyway?"

"Somebody farted… let’s get out of here"

"Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them"

"The word of the day is ‘legs’, let’s go back to my place and spread the word "

"In my spare time I'm an astronaut. My next mission? I'm gonna explore Uranus"

"Do you have pet insurance? Well you're gonna need it once I've smashed your p*ssy"

"Were you born on a farm? Cos you are very good at raising cocks"

"I have only three months to live"

"I went to school with your mum, fancy a drink?"

"I don’t know much about flowers, but you can put your tulips around my c*ck"

"I'm a great shag, ask that girl over there"

"Do you work at subway? Cos you're giving me a foot long"

"How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fertilised?"

"Your body reminds me of a spanner - every time I think of it my nuts tighten up"

"If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?"

"There's a party in my mouth. Do you wanna come?"

"If you are what you eat, I could be you by morning"

"Did you know there are 256 bones in the body? Do you want one more?"


"Why don't you come back to my place? I've got a bottle of taboo with your name on it" – Abdul

"Is it hot in here or is it you?" – Andrea

"Would you sleep with me for £100,000? Lady: yes. Bloke: Ok, now we've established what you are, let’s negotiate" – Benji

"Roses are red, violets are blue, I've got a f*cking knife, now get in the van"

"Do you want to have sex with me?" Apparently 1 in 20 girls say yes if you say it confidently enough – Dan

"Did it hurt? When you fell out of heaven?" – Denis

"Sit on my face and tell me that you love me" – Imogen

"Nice cans, can I maul you?" – Jake

"Do you wanna play a game? It's called house. You play the back doors and I'll smash them in" – Jason

An ice cube gets put on the bar top and smashed with the underside of an ash tray. The guy says “now that we have broken the ice, how about I buy you a drink?!" - JJ

"Hi, I'm Mr. Right, someone said you were looking for me" – Julie

Girl slaps guy in the face for being too forward, guy answers: "why don’t you do that a bit slower, a bit more playful, and in my bedroom?" – Mario

"What time do you finish?" – Mark

"Get your pants off, you're on next" – Martin

"Do you come here often?" – Nathan

Guy:’Fat Penguin’


Guy:‘I just wanted to say something to break the ice’ - Ali